Hiatus

Alright, all you fans out there. As you've noticed my posts have kind of gone down hill lately. The summer is killing me and I have little or no time to get my creative juices flowing. So I think I need a little vaca. Give me a few weeks. 2 at the most and I will be back in the saddle. I promise I am not going AWOL. I am just regrouping.

It hasn't been all bad during these dog days of summer. W realized that he "loves Daddy and he loves ketchup". That's big news and he's funnier than ever. and Porter is all smiles excepts when he's walking up to older kids and wacking them in the head. Can't explain it. He's talking in almost full sentences and is quite the man. So I will leave you on that note. Until the 14th of August!

Happy Anniversary, J!

J and I have been married 5 years. Woweeee! It feels like I have been married to him forever but at the same time it's gone by so fast. and whaddya know? I still love him like I did when we got married and probably more if that's possible. I still like to sit next to him when we go to dinner with a group. The trend seems to be to "let's mix it up! and not sit next to our own husbands!" which really irks me. I like my husband and want to sit next to him. even after 5 years. We will be celebrating at home this weekend but in a few months we are heading to Napa for a big time celebration!

Happy Anniversary, J! I love you.
Me

Hardy: Miami Social

There's a new reality show coming soon. Miami Social. My radar was all in a twitter because, well, you know how I love the reality show. I continue to FF through commercial after commercial as I watch only recorded tv until I see a preview for Miami Social. But J doesn't share my interest. He said nonchalantly one night, "That looks like a snoozer." He didn't know my thoughts on it but he swayed me with his one comment because a. he usually likes reality tv and b. I didn't need to overwhelm my tv schedule with another show. So I put it out of my mind but I continued to watch the previews and then I saw Hardy, one of these Miami Socialites.

I KNOW HIM! He's my friend! I swear it! But I couldn't figure out how? I then I figured it out. He dated a friend of a friend. No! That's not it. Oh! He was friends with my friends' boyfriend from 20 years ago. Or wait, I think I know him from my TCU days. One of those Texas pretty boys. Really? I can't remember? Then I read his bio and saw that he's in hospitality. Did I work with him back in the day? So I started emailing all of the people who might possibly know him after which I started googling him to get some more scoop.

It didn't take me long to find out the info I was looking for or to be totally embarrased. So embarrased that I was laughing trying to decide whether to share this with J, I finally figured out how I know Hardy Hill.

Dare I tell you? It is embarrassing. He was on Season 2 of Big Brother. Pitiful, I know, to think that I am so enthralled with reality tv that I mistake a new reality celebrity for my friend.

TV the old school way

We had to watch tv, the old school way the other night because our DVR was out. and it was MISERABLE! We had to flip through the stations to find something to watch and had to watch everything live. Ugh! It really changed the way we watched tv once we got DVR. We rarely watch anything that hasn't been recorded and if there is nothing recorded to watch we can atleast flip through the guide. We can get the kids to bed without worrying about missing something good, like the Bachelorette (I'm obsessed) and never have to waste our time with commercials.

It was almost as bad as not having a remote control. Remember those days? But I realized that we have just become darn lazy. My finger was tired from flipping, my mind was overwhelmed by all of the channels so I just went to sleep.

I saw Pman fall face first into the pool. He was trying to scoop water into his buckets from the steps and he lost his balance. He struggled hard, with his little legs kicking and his arms flailing until our friend pulled him up. I was swimming with W and got there at the moment his head lifted out of the pool and grabbed him with a fierceness that I never knew. I will never forget that moment. Luckily his head was only under for less than 5 seconds. Not even enough time for the lifeguard to jump into the pool. He must have held his breath because he didn't come up coughing and was just terribly scared. Everyone went on with their day except for me. I just cannot shake this awful feeling. It could have been so much worse and it was my fault. It's the same feeling I had when W fell backwards in his bath when he was the same age. Except I saw W's face looking up at me from under the water in that split second. Ohhhh. I called the doctor to ask if I should bring him in. What if he took in water? and he was tired. . Although it was his naptime, I just wanted to check and she reassured me he was ok. You can never be vigilant enough by or in a pool. It takes a split second for a child to slip under and I just want to remind everyone of that. Even though I know and so do you. It was irresponsible of me to have them both on the steps thinking that this wouldn't happen and I am crying just thinking about it. Until they can both swim I will never relax again.

I love being a mom but....

All last week it was Camp S over here. W was out of camp and for some reason (which I can't for the life of me remember now) decided not to sign him up for anything for this month. My friend V convinced me that I could do it, this Camp S thing and plan our days of entertainment by myself. Little did I know that a. she would be out of town this month and b. that I am not the doer kind of mom that she is and would be going crazy.

The holiday weekend couldn't have come soon enough. So we spent the weekend mornings at the pool and I had J to help hustle them to and fro and care for them at all times. I love my husband.

So when he was kissing us goodbye this morning, the dread kicked in. Did you watch Oprah on Friday? about moms? I believe it was a rerun but it was good. and one mom was quoted as saying "I love being a mom. I just hate doing it."

I wanted to yell at the tv and say ME!ME!ME! I love being a mom, always. I do, but there are definitely those days that I hate doing it. The times that I hate doing it is when the constant fighting ensues. Golly, if I could have someone else get them dressed and bathed and out the door my life would be pure joy.

I say then but then I think about it and I realize that if I did have someone else do that for me I would miss all of those joyful moments when W finally says, "It's hard....but I DID IT!' or when he learns how to blubber his lip and will only talk to adults while blubbering his lip (this just started today). It really is hilarious. Or how about when Pman tries with all of his might to put on his shoe at the ripe old age of 1 1/2 and how he asks me for "ike" instead of "ice" and how he blubbers his lip almost as good as W or when you tell him to not touch something and he sticks his finger on it just one more time. I would miss all of that not to mention that the pure joy that I would get from someone else doing it would be a wash because I would not have the pure joy of those moments that actually come with the dreaded battles and consequences. Does that make sense?