Tuesday, October 14, 2008

When I was pregnant with Pman one of my biggest concerns was how the LB was going to feel once he was born. Was he going to feel like we abandoned him? Would he feel left out? Would he be really jealous of the baby and hate him and wish he would go away? I think it's a normal feeling to have with the 2nd child. You have gotten so used to your life with just the one, your daily routines, that you can't imagine incorporating anyone else into it.

Well, I had the baby and I think it was probably me that needed to adjust the most. The LB hung on to J for the most part. He figured it out when I was in the hospital I guess, that Dad was doing everything for him now. and it didn't seem to bother him. It just bothered me that he didn't want to hang out. He liked the baby and all and was awfully sweet to him-more so than he is now. and that's just it. I keep telling my friend who is about to have twins that the feeling goes away and you find a new normal. and part of that is true. You find a new normal but that worrisome feeling never went away. It's still here. Every time I have to stop playing with W to tend to Pman. He gives me a look, like hey, mom, we were rockin' and rollin' over here and now you're leaving. I get the same look when I scold him for taking something away from the baby and every day after bath time when I have to leave W still wet and wrapped in a towel to get Pman crying from the hallway because he can't keep up with us. and it makes me sad for him. It makes me sad that he won't ever remember when he was the Main Man around here.

No comments: